Trouble in paradise

As these games of the 29th Olympiad roll on, we are learning that not all is going according to plan, despite the best efforts of the Chinese to micromanage the living daylights out of everything.

For example, though the Games have been sold out forever, many fans apparently have come disguised as empty seats. This has been blamed on, among other things, the fact that scalping technology in China lags behind what goes on in Wrigleyville.

There are storm clouds on another front as well. On the heels of reports that fireworks were faked for the Opening Ceremony, now we learn that cute little girl singer was pulling a Milli Vanilli during her (not-so-live) performance of "Ode to the Motherland."

All this evidence of trickery and manipulation is distressing to us here at Sports Pros(e). The next thing you know, someone at NBC might decide to mess with the time-space continuum by showing highlights whenever they want instead of airing them live.