No welcome mat for Barry

One of the things we love about Ozzie Guillen -- apart from that little trinket he brought back to Armour Square a few years ago -- is his willingness to honestly answer any question put to him ...

On Friday, Ozzie addressed the subject of whether the Sox would pursue the currently unemployed Barry Bonds should Jim Thome go down with an injury. The short answer is: Not in this lifetime ...

After saying a couple of times "Barry can't play for my club," Ozzie apparently tries to soften the message a bit by calling Bonds "to me, the best in the history of baseball, no matter what" ...

Uh, not so much ...

The best player in baseball history -- and no one else is in the same ballpark, so to speak -- was a guy who batted .342 with 714 homers, a .690 slugging percentage and a 1.164 OPS (those last two are major league records). Oh, and he was also 94-46 as a pitcher with a 2.28 ERA. You might have heard of him: George Herman Ruth Jr. ...

After the Babe, you could make a pretty good case for Willie Mays, for his combination of power, speed and defense, or Ted Williams. Who knows what kind of numbers Teddy Ballgame could have put up had he not missed three full seasons serving in World War II, as well as most of two more for a second military stint during the Korean War?

So Barry's not the best of all time and he's not the best fit for the Sox. What is he? Some -- OK, many -- would say he's the worst thing to happen to the game since the Black Sox scandal. To me, Bonds' story is less a national (pastime) tragedy -- the game will survive, it always has -- than a personal one ...

Because if what we all suspect is true -- that he built his legacy on a foundation of chemical enhancement -- Bonds is facing a lot bigger problems down the road than being unable to find a DH gig in the American League. Nine years ago, I talked to a former minor leaguer who used anabolic steroids. You can see for yourself what they did for his career -- and his life ...

Is the price Bonds paid for his success worth it? Only he can answer that question ...

Ozzie Guillen is patiently waiting for your E-mail

Ozzie Guillen is lacking creativity in the Hotmail account naming department. But at least he checks his inbox.

All Cubs, all Sox, all the time

Three down. Three to go. Please head on over to the Chicago Sun-Times today at 3 p.m. CST to join the author and fellow wise-cracker Kevin Allen for a live blogcast of today's Cubs-Sox game at U.S. Cellular Field. Here's a little sampling of what you can talk about around the water cooler while you wonder where Santa's going to outsource his labor to:

The White Sox can't win the season series with the Cubs, but maybe if they start winning Ozzie can enjoy his dinner in peace. Guillen explains: "I don't want to hear people talk about baseball as soon as the game is over, but you're in Chicago, you have to do that. I went to an Italian restaurant, they only know about soccer. All of a sudden, this guy comes up to me speaking in Italian about [one of the games last weekend]. I'm thinking, 'Oh, God, that's just what I need.' ''

One of Chicago's toughest critics says the Cubs have what it takes to break that oh-so-vexing hex that's been hanging over their heads for a century. And they seem to be taking the high road in the little war of words started last series.

This is pretty cool, but kind of renders all this weekend's silly baseball-playing a little pointless.

Cubs not exactly keeping things uniform

The whole world, or at least the part of it outside of Europe, seems to have gone a little Cubs crazy lately. They've won 14 straight at Wrigley Field and are fresh off a sweep of the White Sox. Ryan Dempster is pitching like he's never seen this page and even Ozzie Guillen gushed about those ol' lovable losers lately.

Even with all this curse-breaking fever in the air, it's surprising to see ESPN's Paul Lukas devote an entire column on those seemingly "timeless" uniforms. While the author is no fashion expert like some former roommates, he feels smarter about the whole issue after reading this.

A case of the Mondays

If you're a White Sox fan in a predominantly Cubs-friendly office, then today is probably not going well. But once, you've sifted through the cute "your team sucks" e-mails, take solace in the fact that it's late June and your Pale Hose are leading a division they probably don't have any business leading. Besides, it could be worse.

And if you're one of those overly-giddy Northsiders peppering pro-Sox co-workers with catcalls, realize it's only late June and your Cubbies still have a long road of curse-reversing to do before you can die in peace.

That being said, this weekend at Wrigley was more lopsided than Placido Polanco's head. The Cubs unequivocally emerged as the better ballclub, Lou pressed the right buttons more often than Ozzie and Aramis Ramirez played like he'd never been a Pittsburgh Pirate at all.

For a fan base that falls head-over-heels for their team anytime they show any glimpse of brilliance, you understand why this incarnation of the Cubs is so appealing. That 100-year anniversary business just adds fuel to the fire and pictures like this only enflame the most sensitive of North Side sensibilities.